angel kisses and mustard seeds

11 Nov

My freckle fell off. I cant find it anywhere. I have several others, but this was the one my grandma kissed. She kissed it once while she told me freckles were angel kisses. I had just come inside after playing with my friends. We were making a potion to create evil spells. I do not know what we were going to do with that kind of power, but we were young and impetuous. You would think that a grandma would have been intimidated by a spell bearing 6 year old, but she really wasn’t. She said she didn’t care if I was dangerous and just wanted to kiss my angel kisses. She started with this one that had always been on my right cheek. I don’t know how many she kissed before my attention ran away and led me to some new adventure.

I was looking in the mirror recently. I have shaved my graying beard in a desperate attempt to look a few years younger. I noticed the freckle wasn’t there. I am not sure how long it has been gone, but it wasn’t there. I wondered if grandma kissed it off. Maybe the freckle moved to my forearm or something. Could I have shaved it off? I am a little worried about it. To be a lost freckle in a world of varied pigmented skin lesions must be terrifying. If he gets a job on someone else’s face, he would be biopsied as a changing lesion.

My other grandma had a watch with a small bubble attached to the band. In the semi-clear bubble, there was a tiny mustard seed. I never really understood what she was talking about when she told of Faith the size of a mustard seed. I pretended I did. I remember that when I was 9 or so, she lost the bubble with the magic seed. I was very worried for her and started looking in the couch and on the floor. She just shrugged and announced she’d get another one. I was a little surprised that a magic mountain moving seed could be so abundant. I wonder if losing your mustard seed is like losing my freckle? I mean, maybe its gone and you don’t really notice for awhile. You go on living and loving and then look closely in the mirror and realize you don’t have Faith anymore. Maybe you reminisce about it, remembering Grandma’s kisses or the bubble clicking against the watch face.

I actually think that Faith cannot be lost. I think it is always there. I think everyone has an innate understanding of God. We just choose to announce it or show it. I think the mustard seed might not be dangling from our dainty watch. However, once we have had it showing, or had it nurtured and celebrated by a kissing grandma or the like, we will always have been someone who had it. It becomes part of us, it changes who we are forever, regardless of whether we hide it or try and change it.

Hey look, I think I see my freckle!

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Posted by on November 11, 2013 in faith


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